working

For those of you who know me for a while now, work has been a wondrous thing. I love it both because it's the means to support my lifestyle, and also because it defines me, as someone who contributes.

I never claim to be an ambitious person, but as I grow to love my career, I want to do so much more because I find that I can.

It's been marvelous to test my limits only to find that I can do even more. Feel excited about the upcoming assignments.

Several pieces of my writing will find their way to Board of Supervisor and Planning Commission meetings, and I can't wait to go to the hearings!

gushing

Traits that I admire in men that I used to not appreciate:

good vocabulary
curiosity
wicked humor
optimism
sexiness
sharp dresser
humility

And guess who has all these qualities? ;)

calm after the storm

So the discussion got so intense with C that I started to talk to friends. That's how I resolve a lot of issues - I talk it out with everyone until it disappears.

Thanks to everyone who lent a ear.

Last night, the irony was that I called some friends and got either voicemail or people who couldn't talk long.

Then, C sent me a cute text, and of course I had to call him back. It was sweet, just our usual checking-in goodnights. He has a golf tournament today, and I wished him well.

So, things are good again. I am reminded by my energy session to just let the emotions pass through and remain clear about my intentions.

honesty

Told C last night that I feel compelled to find someone who would make a better partner. I know, ouch. I had to explain why I was distancing myself. It was a "It's me, not you" speech.

We are still dating, but I am not feeling optimistic. Remember my bell-shaped theory of love?

I am learning that I don't want love to be the deciding factor in my relationship. It should be compatibility and life goals.

My objective is for C to learn how I see the world and relationships. He might just be the one who walk away first...

clarity

Another successful session with my energy lady, Maria.

I came to terms with my fear of the fun times with C will fizz once it gets serious. For now, it's just dating.

The best part about the session is having her clear away expectations. Many of those come from others, but I also put expectations on myself.

Time to just chill and let things happen but still stay focused. A fine balance.